miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
