yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
