You were right. It hurts to walk today.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
