I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
home. puking in laundry basket.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Randomize
