At least make sure they are 18
Why
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
We smell like vodka and hangover
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
