I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I just want nice things and good sex
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
