Dual....:-)
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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