R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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