How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
