Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
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