But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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