She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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