I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
