Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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