I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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