butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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