i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
that's an acceptable place to lick
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
