New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
