My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
i would one night stand the shit outta him
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
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