a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize