we have officially lost it.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
