Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?

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  (773): Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home? http://tfl.nu/5b5c
  Replies (4) Good night (845) Bad night (952)
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  (212): View more from New York

  It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.

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  (212): It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you. http://tfl.nu/rmlk
  Replies (23) Good night (600) Bad night (1587)
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  (818): View more from California

  Finally jerked of with a banana peel.

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  (818): Finally jerked of with a banana peel. http://tfl.nu/gj9m
  Replies (27) Good night (1508) Bad night (4590)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?

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  (250): is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste? http://tfl.nu/l5cc
  Replies (35) Good night (5063) Bad night (2292)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.

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  (706): That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night. http://tfl.nu/8vqf
  Replies (10) Good night (5119) Bad night (986)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes

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  (519): dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes http://tfl.nu/xjd2
  Replies (61) Good night (6287) Bad night (1115)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.

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  (603): Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty. http://tfl.nu/d4ib
  Replies (9) Good night (5225) Bad night (1018)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.

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  (502): update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive. http://tfl.nu/e1l9
  Replies (10) Good night (4851) Bad night (1378)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis

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  (603): it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis http://tfl.nu/b4c1
  Replies (18) Good night (1383) Bad night (2560)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.

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  (501): So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again. http://tfl.nu/au9d
  Replies (15) Good night (1324) Bad night (3244)
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  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  next time we drink: battle shots.

  (1-403): View more from Alberta, CA

  battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.

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  (403): next time we drink: battle shots. (1-403): battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out. http://tfl.nu/hwdw
  Replies (9) Good night (1209) Bad night (657)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.

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  (757): I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date. http://tfl.nu/oqzd
  Replies (5) Good night (1499) Bad night (670)
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  (415): View more from California

  I have a present for you

  (415): View more from California

  Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked

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  (415): I have a present for you (415): Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked http://tfl.nu/cd6u
  Replies (6) Good night (960) Bad night (240)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.

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  (505): I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp. http://tfl.nu/vrdl
  Replies (3) Good night (563) Bad night (291)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me

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  (770): so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me http://tfl.nu/3pww
  Replies (3) Good night (1115) Bad night (292)

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