No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Just took my morning after pill in the library
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
