Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
her vagine was all disorganized.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize