what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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