You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
