K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Randomize
