Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
