Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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