Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
