You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
