Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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