shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
