I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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