We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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