she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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