sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
