____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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