it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
