i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
