brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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