We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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