so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
