dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
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bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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