Moan for me like Helen Keller
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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