Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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