He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
