we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
