Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk