Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
