where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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